I'm taking the opportunity in this post to tell you more about the service I provide to marrying couples, like Valerie and Gary who had a very happy wedding in the Heart Garden last week.
I've chosen as my logo ‘Your day is my focus’? What does this mean?
It means that from the moment I wake up on your wedding day,
my thoughts are on your wedding and helping you make it wonderful. Actually,
before the big day I am already working towards your most successful and memorable
day.
Why would you choose me as your celebrant? Here are twelve
good reasons:
* I am enthusiastic. I totally love the
work I do. My role and purpose are to serve you. I consider it a real privilege
to be with you at this most significant time in the life you share together. I
will put my heart into your wedding (but I promise I won’t go OTT!)
* I am very experienced. I know what I'm
doing – I really know what I'm
doing!
I’ve been celebrant for nearly nine hundred weddings. This has given me
heaps of experience in many different settings,like a balloon, boats
large and small, large islands like Springbank in Lake Burley Griffin, and of course Aspen Island with the National Carillon, and an island in the Macquarie River that so small, only five of us could fit and the guests sat on the bank
across the water. I officiated at a ceremony in a local Catholic chapel (with the blessing of the priest in
charge). I've taken part in many other different circumstances, like getting married sitting in
the living room or family room with a couple of friends, having a wedding ceremony within a
choral concert in the Brindabellas, a wedding in a bush chapel on a hill high
above Wells Station and a sunset wedding on Tharwa bridge when it was closed to
traffic, and so on and so on. I’ve even married twin sister brides in a dual
ceremony in Glebe Park!
I’ve officiated at Buddhist
weddings, a Quaker wedding, themed weddings (including a mediaeval wedding in
the Senate Chamber of Old Parliament House) and a wedding for a minor where we
needed permission from the court. I’ve shared two weddings, complete with
prayers, with ex-priest Paul Collins.
If you are overseas (one or both) and you plan to marry in Australia, you can be confident that I can help you every step along the way to realising your plan, like preparing letters to immigration authorities.
I’ve learned to greet guests in
Mandarin, Japanese, Finnish, Spanish and French. I’ve even read a poem in Latin
during a beautiful private ceremony and just had to hope that my pronunciations
were OK. I love the variety in this amazing job!
* I won’t overbook. Your wedding day
needs to be as stress-free as possible. You want to know that your celebrant
won’t be delayed at someone else’s wedding and turn up late for yours. If I
have more than one booking on a particular day, the weddings will be generously
spaced with plenty of time-cushioning. I’ll always have my mobile with me to
answer calls or messages.
* I’ll be there. In over twenty years, I
have never been ill or had to change a wedding arrangement. If my perfect
record had to change for any reason, I could easily recommend an excellent
replacement. As well as knowing celebrants who have been authorised for as long
as I have, I recently met many of my new celebrant colleagues at our annual
Ongoing Professional Development. Changing your celebrant is a very simple
process, even at the last minute if the need arises.
* I’ll make your marriage totally legal.
You can be confident that I will carry out the requirements of the Australian
Marriage Act to the letter. I am confident about claiming that I am one of the
few civil celebrants who has actually read the entire Marriage Act, cover to
cover.
If there’s anything about the current
nature of legal marriage in Australia you’re not comfortable with – and this is
not uncommon – then we’ll find a way together to work strictly within the Act.
Some celebrants may leave out
legal requirements, like the requirement for each of you to state your legal
names to your guests and call on them to witness your marriage. The couple then
receives their certificate at the end of the ceremony, yet their marriage may
not be absolutely legal. With me as your celebrant, you’ll never have this worry.
* I'm flexible. Many civil celebrants are
not comfortable with religious or spiritual content in weddings but I am. I'm
also very happy to include extra elements, like lighting candles, exchanging roses,
poruwa (traditional Sri Lankan wedding platform) or the Jewish shattering of the
glass. A formal ceremony is just as easy for me as an informal one.
I'm happy to totally step aside
and let the couple and their special people run the wedding themselves, calling
on me to just do the solemnising, or legalising. I'm also very happy to conduct
a ceremony with a trainee celebrant and provide feedback.
I can be available for a wedding
at any time so if the time to start needs to be auspicious according to your
culture, I will go along with that personal choice.
I had a wedding recently where
the bride and groom were in a remote part of South America. They needed to find
a notary to sign their Notice of Intended Marriage and get it to me the
statutory month and a day before their wedding date. By the time they’d got to a
capital city and found a notary, and emailed the Notice to me, the month and a
day took them to the next day, being the day the groom’s parents were leaving
Australia to fly back home.
Our solution? Hold the wedding at one minute past midnight.
And it was so lovely! We had candles, and fairy lights in the trees. There was
even a full moon to light the ceremony, and since it was just after Christmas,
the evening was warm and most pleasant.
|
Robyn and Julian had a wedding during their
engagement party at their home in Fadden
and totally surprised their guests.
What a party! |
I’ve also had weddings at dawn,
like one on Mount Ainslie at sunrise, one on Mount Taylor at the same time, and
one by the lake that was rather chilly for the feet.
Sometimes the party’s already
started when the wedding takes place and I'm easy with that too. I’ve
officiated at quite a few weddings like this. They have quite a different feel
to them to traditional weddings that begin with the entrance of the bridal
party to the chosen site.
* I present myself well. Sometimes I hear
horror stories about celebrants who wore inappropriate clothing to a wedding,
like loud clashing colours. When a celebrant stands out for all the wrong
reasons in the memory of couples or their guests, it seems that these memories
are particularly long lasting!
I take great care with my appearance.
I buy high quality, well cut suits and my jewellery is discreet. I will always
ask you your colour scheme so I can blend in unobtrusively with my clothing
choice. If I'm invited as a guest, I will usually wear something that’s less
businesslike.
You may have been to a wedding
where you couldn’t hear what the celebrant was saying. I have a portable,
battery-driven state-of-the-art PA system with cordless microphone. The sound
quality is excellent, and I'll do a sound-check before we start the ceremony.
Sometimes the bride and groom
like to hold the microphone for their personal vows. At other times, I will say
to guests something like:‘Simon and Tasha will now share vows they have chosen
just for each other’ so guests understand they may not hear all that is being
said at that intimate part of the ceremony.
My voice is well-modulated I’ve
had two years of voice training and done several voice training workshops. I
used to talk every week on Radio 2CC and occasionally on community radio 2XX
and the ABC. I’ve sold a couple of thousand relaxation tapes, featuring my
gentle and relaxing Australian voice.
By the way, I am confident that
if you want a guaranteed way to relax on the lead-up to your wedding, or on the
actual day, then Time Out for Ten will work for you every time. You can buy it now
as an mp3 $7US by way of PayPal or credit card, or debit card, again through
PayPal. PayPal will automatically do the currency conversion. Just click this link. (Enjoy!)
* I am upfront about my fee. (see Wedding Pages to the right of this post)
The fee I quote you covers
everything and I put it in writing. There may be extra for out-of-town travel, but there are no hidden costs.
My fee is payable in two
parts. The non-refundable deposit is due at a meeting that takes about
half an hour. This is when you lodge the Notice of Intended Marriage with me as
registered celebrant. This meeting must take place at least one month and one
day before the wedding. (Note here that all registered celebrants are lodging
authorities and we don’t send anything to the Registrar at this stage.)
If you’ve
opted for Simple (but still) Special Service I provide, then you pay the full fee at the one meeting we have together, at least one month and one day before
your wedding. This meeting takes about an hour.
With my usual full service, the
balance is payable (plus any extra for travel) at a one-hour meeting,
usually in the week of the wedding. At this meeting we have a thorough virtual
rehearsal that covers every little thing so that when it comes to the wedding,
you’ll be totally confident about exactly what’s happening and what happens when.
After the wedding, I send your papers to the Registrar for registration (as all
celebrants do).
When you book with me, I will
tell you exactly what costs are involved and I’ll provide you with a signed
agreement. I will only quote extra for travel when I need to go beyond ‘city
limits’ – past Watson, Lanyon, Hall or Queanbeyan. I calculate the extra for my
return journey beyond these limits at $1.20 per kilometre (or less per km for
long distances) and note the calculation in our agreement.
* I’m readily available. I am
self-employed. I'm available for weddings during weekends or week days. I'm
available day or night. If you choose to marry in my Heart Garden – and there’s
no extra fee for this - it will be a small weekday wedding.
Because I'm a writer, my timing
is flexible. Please feel free to phone me any day between 9am and 9pm to chat
about your wedding or ask me any questions. I'm usually at my computer during
the day (if I haven’t been lured into the garden by some particularly enjoyable
task) and I'm often at my computer after dinner, so if you email me, expect a
swift reply.
Like I said,
I'm a writer. I’ve had many articles published in newspapers and on line on
personal wellbeing. I have almost finished my first eBook.
Using my expertise, I’ll help you
prepare a unique and memorable ceremony. It may be short, straightforward and standard.
It may be a ceremony that’s decidedly different. So long as we cover the legal
requirements, the choice is entirely yours. When we have our first meeting
together, you’ll see lots of wording ideas that I’ve put together and updated
over the years.
There’ll be a variety of simple
or complicated ceremonies to take home with you, a collection of suggestions
and detailed notes about exactly what has to be included to make your wedding
legal. Of course you can add wording from any other source to individualise
your ceremony, like vows on TV you liked or poems from the internet. You can be
as creative, traditional or original as you wish. (For instance, you don’t need
to make matching vows.)
If your choice is my new Simple
(but still) Special Service, I’ll provide you with a simple set ceremony and
adapt it with your details. You can make choices from a few options within the
ceremony, like do you prefer ‘ask those here present’ to ‘call on those here
present’ in the legal part? Choose your own ending, like the traditional ‘I now
declare you husband and wife’, the less formal ‘Congratulations. You are
married!’ or the exciting ‘It’s now time for your first kiss as...husband and
wife’. This appeals to many couples as they’ve been living together for some
time.
Most couples mix and match until
they make a ceremony that expresses what they both feel good about (and I hear
that this is not difficult to do.) Once you’ve put your words together,
together, I can give you any help you need to make sure your ceremony will
‘flow’ well on the day (like making sure you won’t be holding too many things
at once, like flowers, ring, wording, microphone.)
So many times after the ceremony,
guests have told me how much they enjoyed the ceremony because it sounded ‘so
right’ for the couple they know so well. ‘The best wedding I’ve ever been to’
is not an uncommon comment. (In fact, if no guests approached me after a
ceremony to tell me how much they liked it, I’d be really worried I got
something wrong!)
With your chosen wording, you’ll
email a draft to me before our second meeting then we’ll take time together
going through and making any changes. It’s only when I’ve keyed in the changes,
sent them to you for your approval (or further change) and received the final
OK from you both that I will print your ceremony ready for your wedding.
I’ll print your ceremony in the
font you’ve chosen for your wording and certificate on elegant cream parchment
paper, in lightweight parchment for the ceremony wording, and heavier weight
for the cover. (It’s a similar colour to the wedding certificate you receive on
the day.) I’ll use my laser printer so you can be sure that if there are
raindrops (or teardrops when you are reading to each other) the ink will not
run.
I’ll use the same special paper
for wording for your readers if you’d like, I’ll tie your wording into a
booklet with ribbon you have chosen to match your wedding colour scheme. I’ll
also make sure that any words you choose to read to each other during your
ceremony are printed in Bookman 14 so they’re easier to read than the fancy
font you’ve chosen for your wording and certificate. I’ll also make sure the
whole vows for both of you are on the one page so you won’t need to turn over. (Don’t
want to give you any cause for stress!)
After the wedding, I will hand a
plastic wallet containing your wording and certificate to one of your guests
for safe-keeping - usually someone in the family of the bride or groom.
* You’ll know exactly what to expect on the
day. Like I said before, at our second meeting, we’ll go through in fine
detail, everything you can expect on the day. This works like a very detailed
rehearsal. If you choose to have a physical rehearsal, or a simple walk-through
individually with each participant (like the father of the bride) and I do
think that this is a good idea so everyone involved is familiar with their role
on the day, someone else can easily stand in for me.
I’ll make
sure that you are both very well-informed about proceedings. I can’t however,
prepare you for the unique emotional atmosphere of your wedding ceremony. What
I can do though, when we are standing together about to start your ceremony, is
wait for each of you to feel that you are totally present. I missed the
beautiful much-anticipated ‘Dearly beloved, we are gathered here’ at the
beginning of my own wedding many years ago because I was so overwhelmed.
I want to make sure that you are
present, centred and grounded for your marriage to each other before the
ceremony begins. I’ll start when you each give me the nod. I will speak clearly
and slowly during your ceremony so everyone can take in the wording you have
chosen (though it’s likely you’ll think it all goes way too fast!)
* I won’t appear in the middle of your
wedding photos. I will not stand in the traditional place between the bride
and groom (unless you ask me to, of course.)
|
Josh makes his vows to his beautiful Bryony
(Note there's no celebrant standing in between them)
The Heart Garden February 2009
|
I prefer to stand slightly off to
the side. From here I can have face-to-face contact with all the guests, as
well as the marrying couple. It also means that the bride and groom are at the
centre of everything, instead of the celebrant. This will also give you what
always feels to me like a ‘sacred space’ of your own. Sometimes I even feel a
need to step aside a little further when vows are being shared, as the emotions
are so powerful and personal.
When you see your wedding photos,
you won’t see me in shot at those very special moments, like when you’re making
your vows, exchanging rings or enjoying your first kiss as husband and wife. I
think you’ll be glad of that.
* I can help you with other choices for your
wedding. I am familiar with hundreds of wedding venues in ACT and nearby
NSW, from little quiet places in a bush setting, to grand amphitheatres - even
grand amphitheatres in a bush setting!
I know what’s flowering when to
give you a great backdrop for your ceremony and impress your guests, especially
those from interstate and overseas. I know of unusual places, like the room at
the top of the National Carillon with its stunning views in all directions, and
a magical place in a wild wood near the lake, with large spotted toadstools
like in fairytales, and places with cathedralesque gum trees, and a forest with
mighty redwoods, perfect for mediaeval nuptials.
I can recommend reception places (I
can even tell you who makes the best canapés!) I know several excellent
photographers. I’ve seen a few extraordinary wedding cakes and found out who
made them. I know very good florists. Would you like a harpist or a singer? I
can recommend musicians. I'm happy to help you with ideas about other wedding
services and please note that, while I certainly have my favourites, I have no commercial arrangements with
any wedding service providers.
The majority of my celebrant work
comes from word-of-mouth. This blog is a creative outlet that brings me a lot of
pleasure and satisfaction. I’ve set it up, not only to promote the service I
offer but also as a service to anyone who wants to get married in Australia,
particularly in Canberra or nearby NSW.
I'm pleased to say that ‘Michele
the Celebrant’ does bring me wedding bookings, but in my steady stream of
bookings, most still come from word-of-mouth recommendations, Often the
recommendations come from couples who had me officiate for them. Lots of times
I’ve been recommended by people who were guests at a wedding where I was
celebrant. I’ve become ‘our celebrant’ to several families and groups of
friends and that’s just lovely. I get to meet the babies and see them grow.
(It’s been over twenty years now!)
That’s about
all I can think of at the moment. I’ll keep this list dynamic so I can add to
it or change it anytime.
Please let me know if there are
any questions you have about the service I provide as celebrant that I haven’t
covered here. Email me, or phone 02 6161 0718 any day between 9am and 9pm. My job is to make you totally confident about your choice of wedding
celebrant and help you stay relaxed and full of joyful anticipation. After all,
there are no second chances here. You really want to get it right on the one
and only big day.
To me you are always my valued
clients and I am your service provider. I am here to please you, and provide
you with satisfying service. I am totally committed to making your wedding
fully legal, a great pleasure to take part in, a most memorable success, and
a great lead-in to your celebrations.
Your day is my focus. That’s my promise. It’s my pleasure.
Sincerely
Michele Bolitho
5 October 2010